More workers called in sick in January than the past 5 years

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HOUSTON, TX – The Bureau of Labor Statistics says more Americans called in sick to work in January than during any month in the 5 years. Nearly 2.9 million full time workers only put in part-time hours during the week they were sick with the flu and 1.2 million employees were off the entire week they came down with the bug.

Unfortunately for the more seasoned Americans out there, their sick-days most likely are not an excuse for playing hookie.

The CDC says this season’s flu vaccine was almost completely ineffective in people 65 and older, helping only about 9% of cases.

That’s a pretty good explanation for why hospitalization and death rates have been some of the highest on record for this age group, but if this gets much worse they’re going to have to hold AARP meetings in HAZAMAT suits!