US to seize Iranian-owned skyscraper in New York

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NEW YORK, NY – So, you think you have a bad landlord. But what if your landlord was funneling money to your sworn enemy?

U.S. District Judge Katherine Forrest has ruled that the owners of some swanky digs on New York’s Fifth Avenue are funneling money to a state-run Iranian bank, which is nothing more than a front for the government or Iran.

The 36-story office complex is home to several financial institutions and a Godiva chocolates store. Rockefeller center is right next door.

The Alavi Foundation is the building’s majority owner. The judge agreed with federal prosecutors that Alavi and the two minority owners were sending rent money to Bank Melli.

Prosecutors also say Bank Melli controls the Alavi Foundation, as well.

So now, Uncle Sam can take over the $500 million building and sell it, because the judge ruled the owners broke United States money-laundering laws and sanctions against Iran.

This ruling comes just a few days after the start of a bro-mance between President Obama and Iran’s new President Hassan Rouhani.

If not true bromancers, then maybe pen pals.

Our President said the two of them exchanged letters about the stand-off between our two countries, and President Obama told Telemundo that he thinks Rouhani wants to snuggle a little closer.

Rouhani, though, may not be ready to get all warm and fuzzy.

Earlier this week said the United States is an uninvited guest in the Middle East, adding that the U.S. must stop practicing Iranophobia.

But he has also says he wants to improve Iran’s relationships with western countries, including the United States.

Yes, but is he willing to seal it with a kiss, like any good pen pal would?