Paul McCartney: ‘Yoko Ono didn’t break up the Beatles’

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LONDON – At least one war ends with a happy ending.  Paul McCartney has finally admitted Yoko Ono didn’t break up The Beatles.

Seriously? You had to wait over four decades to say it? Is it a joke or something? In an interview with Al Jazeera, the guy who is about to rock Houston said Yoko had nothing to do with the separation of the band. “We were breaking up already”, Paul said.  “It was just a matter of time.”

Let’s rewind for a second. Over the years we’ve learned to blame that woman for everything.  According to we-don’t-know-how-many-books she was responsible for poisoning the bond between John and Paul, interrupting rehearsals and creating tension all around. And now Sir McCartney is not only telling us that Yoko is innocent but she was also a source of inspiration. “Lennon wouldn’t have been able to write “Imagine” without her” – he concluded.  Oh, please! Next thing we’ll learn is that Paul was actually killed in a car accident in the ’60s and the guy who’s making up this story is an impostor.

The Rolling Stones didn’t have those issues. They knew how to run their business and are still together.  And no woman would dare mess with their money-making machine.

In any case, we’re sorry Yoko. Let it be.