30 million locusts swarm Egypt: Spring migration or God’s plague?

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CAIRO, EGYPT – What could be better than vacationing in Egypt? The Sphinx, the pyramids. the River Nile or the Biblical plagues.

What?! You didn’t read about those in the travel brochure?

Well, a dark cloud blew into Cairo over the weekend. Not a raincloud, but a cloud of 30 million swarming locusts.

Egypt’s Minister of Agriculture is downplaying the bugs, saying they’re just passing through as part of their spring migration.

But this could prove catastrophic to local crops. See — one locust can consume its weight in vegetation every day. An average swarm can eat as much as 2500 people do.

What brought on this Egyptian nightmare? Some people are buggin’ out and blaming U.S. Secretary of State John Kerry, who arrived in the country about the same time as the locusts.

Others say this is God’s way of commemorating the upcoming Passover, the holiday celebrating the Jews’ escaping enslavement after Egypt’s 10 plagues.

Whatever the case, until the waters turn to blood and Kermit the frog’s cronies drop from the sky; we’re not buying it.

More likely — global warming has mixed up the normal rain conditions, causing more vegetation, more locusts and more swarms.

So next time you visit the Sphinx, just make sure to bring your bug repellant.

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