Go Big or Go Home! Which State is the biggest? No, I’m not talking about miles, I’m talking about penis size. Yes, that’s right.
Condomania.com, which claims to be America’s first online condom store, there is such a thing, has decided to conduct its own very important study. And might I add this is highly scientific!
According to a press release, the website compiled condom sales data by state to find out which states bought a higher-than-average amount of larger-sized condoms.
The result? A list of all 50 states, “ordered by penis size”.
Topping the list, might shock you. North Dakota?! Things are going down in Fargo. Here’s the complete ranking:
- North Dakota
- Rhode Island
- South Dakota
- District of Columbia
- Massachusetts
- Ohio
- Arizona
- Alabama
- New York
- South Carolina
- Colorado
- Maryland
- Wisconsin
- New Jersey
- California
- Florida
- Connecticut
- Virginia
- Oregon
- Pennsylvania
- Washington
- Tennessee
- New Mexico
- Iowa
- Illinois
- Louisiana
- Vermont
- Utah
- Maine
- Nebraska
- Idaho
- Kansas
- Delaware
- Michigan
- Nevada
- New Hampshire
- Oklahoma
- Montana
- Minnesota
- Kentucky
- Texas
- Indiana
- West Virginia
- Missouri
- Alaska
- North Carolina
- Wyoming
- Arkansas
- Hawaii
- Mississippi
I have to say, living in Texas, I’m sorely disappointed. 41st?! I thought everything was supposed to be bigger in Texas. And what happened to Georgia? Are there no penises in that state or are people just not strapping one on? Condomania hasn’t confirmed why they didn’t make the cut (oops sorry bad choice in words).
Fellas don’t be “down” if your state falls short. First, these men might not be measuring right or have a lack of self-awareness. And remember it’s not the size of the tide, it’s the motion of the ocean. In the meantime, I’ll be booking a trip to North Dakota. And don’t worry I’ll pack my measuring tape. Just say’n.
And that’s today’s helping of The Online Dish with Maggie.
