HOUSTON, TX – Think twice before you kick the bucket, my friend. While you might go six feet under, the costs of dying will take the fast track to the heavens.
For starters, you have all those last minute medical treatments that won’t work. It could cost up to $10,000 per day to maintain a patient at an intensive care unit. Then, you have the funeral. Here’s the menu.
“We charge $925 for cremation, and $2,900 for the funeral with cremation,” said Rev. Roydrick Miller, director of Serenity Mortuary Services.
Then you have the urns.
“Prices start at $75 and go as high as $500,” he added.
Costs of caskets can range from a few hundred dollars all the way up to $40,000, depending on the material.
And what about a plot?
“Prices will go from a few hundred dollars to $15,000,” explained Miller, “and an obituary will cost you $11.90 a line; and if you add a picture, it starts somewhere around $95 to $200.”
And if your mourners still have some change left over after buying flowers, that means you’ve planned ahead and bought life insurance; which by the way is all about death and has nothing to do with life. It can cover your funeral expenses.
Although, if you’re looking for a grand exit, check out the British company “Heavens above fireworks”. A darker version of Disney World, they will throw you a spectacular farewell party by turning your ashes into fireworks: and you will really go out with a bang.